Waking up from a drunken stupor
she looks around her shabby room.
Ashtrays full, plates piled in the sink
and a mattress with soiled bed sheets
—her faithful and trusted servants—
torn from years of loveless coupling.
A quick shower behind the mouldy
curtain with cheap soap, cheap shampoo
and an even cheaper scent;
into a bra that's a size or three too small
and a skirt that's been too short for years.
She smokes a roll-up and drinks raki
until she hears her cue for work—
a ship's horn blowing in the distance.
Gasping for air, rank with stale tobacco
and laced with shattered dreams, she opens
her front door and waddles to the harbour.
She recalls her wrecked and wasted life.
First the fear, the panic and the shame
then the buzz, the laughter and the thrills;
until Time —deceitful and a shameless thief—
stole her youth away.
Each night brought a new assault.
Every morning she nursed
the battle scars from the night before
—a small blemish on her flawless skin,
a grey strand in her wild black mane—
until one day the face she saw in the mirror
was not her face any more.
She gazes at the lilacs of the sea
and listens to the noise, savouring
the odours of all the sailors passing by.
Such a sweet aroma. Her head feels light
and maybe because of the bottle of raki
or the warmth of the late Mediterranean sun
she drifts into a rumbling reverie.
In her much loved and much kissed body
all the hurt and pain are now gone.
Old lovers' faces rise in her wrinkled mind—
kings, Bedouins and sultans;
black, white and yellow faces, merge
and she is seventeen and beautiful again.
She dreams and writhes on a rotting bench
until a group of sailors come passing by.
They stop and stare at the old wreck and
—merciless youth— they jeer and mock her.
She wakes and hears their ridicule
the laughter and the heartless jibes.
With tears in her jaded eyes
and cursing the cruelty of the young
she takes the road to the sanctuary
of her seedy room, grieving for the day
that ended before it even had begun.
A few words about the poem…
The Cyprus Poems: The Odyssey of Kakoulla Panayi in the Tapestry of a Transforming Middle East
At the heart of the Cyprus Poems by Chris Zachariou lies "A Shameless Thief," a poem that merges personal memory with broader cultural and historical reflections. The narrative finds its roots in the extraordinary life of Kakoulla Panayi, a figure whose journey encapsulates the trials and resilience of a woman shaped by the shifting tides of the Middle East and Cyprus in the 19th and 20th centuries. Through her lens, the poet crafts a narrative that intertwines the universal themes of loss, survival, and the inexorable passage of time.
Kakoulla Panayi, the poet’s great aunt, was born in the latter part of the 19th century, to a family whose history straddled the geographical and cultural divides of Turkey and Cyprus. Her mother, Katerina, arrived in Cyprus as a child around 1860, escaping the persecution faced by Greek Orthodox Christians in Turkey. This migration planted the seeds of a new life, yet one fraught with the uncertainties that accompanied displacement.
The early chapters of Kakoulla’s life were marked by the innocence of youth, soon disrupted by societal and familial expectations. At just twelve years of age, she was married in a union arranged by her family, a custom reflective of the era. This early marriage, however, brought with it profound challenges, including domestic brutality that led her to flee her husband. Her escape set her on a perilous path, one that would lead her from the sanctity of her family home to the harsh realities of a house of ill repute.
Kakoulla’s life took a further dramatic turn when she was captured and sold into a harem in Arabia. This period of enforced captivity thrust her into a world of opulence laced with subjugation. Yet, even within the confines of such a gilded cage, her indomitable spirit endured. She eventually escaped and made her way back to Cyprus, returning to a homeland that now carried the weight of her experiences and the scars of her survival.
By the time of her return, Kakoulla had transformed into a figure of remarkable resilience. Fluent in Greek, Turkish, and Arabic, she navigated the complexities of her multicultural environment with dexterity. Stories abound of her subsequent ventures, including the ownership of a brothel and a hotel, as well as significant landholdings in the heart of the city. Her entrepreneurial success was emblematic of her unyielding resolve, as she carved out a place for herself in a society that often relegated women to the margins.
Photographs of Kakoulla from this period capture a woman whose beauty persisted, even as time etched its lines upon her face. Among the most striking images is one of her standing beside her car—a rare possession for a woman of her time, symbolising both her wealth and her defiance of societal norms. This was no ordinary life; it was one shaped by a determination to reclaim agency in a world that had sought to suppress her.
The latter years of Kakoulla’s life saw her grappling with physical ailments, including arthritis, which she sought to alleviate through frequent visits to the beaches of Yialousa. These trips, often undertaken in her car, were moments of reflection, where memories of her youth intermingled with the soothing embrace of the sea. The waves seemed to hold within them echoes of her life’s journeys, offering solace and a sense of continuity amid the inexorable march of time.
Yet, the spectre of violence that had marked much of her life reappeared in its final chapter. In 1963, during the intercommunal strife between Greek and Turkish Cypriots, Kakoulla and her husband, Yiannis Ellinas, fell victim to the conflict. The Turkish military, seeking to take ownership of her property, murdered the couple. To this day, their final resting place remains unknown, a painful reminder of the unresolved tensions that continue to shape Cyprus’s history. The family’s search for closure endures, with hope vested in the work of the Committee of Missing Persons.
The poet immortalises Kakoulla’s story in “A Shameless Thief,” weaving her personal history with broader reflections on the passage of time and the loss it entails. An article by Sevgul Uludag in her blog adds further depth to this narrative, offering a bilingual account of Kakoulla’s extraordinary life. This poem, while deeply personal, resonates with universal themes, inviting readers to reflect on the resilience of the human spirit in the face of adversity.
Analysis of the Poem
The poem "A Shameless Thief" is an evocative piece from the collection Cyprus Poems, embodying the raw portrayal of a life unmoored by time, circumstance, and choice. The poem unfolds a deeply introspective narrative that illuminates the trajectory of a woman’s existence, marred by hardship, fleeting joy, and ultimate disillusionment. Through a seamless blend of vivid imagery, stark realism, and a profound understanding of human frailty, the poem crafts a compelling account of survival in an unrelenting world.
The protagonist, though her life is undoubtedly reminiscent of the tales of countless women from a bygone era, navigating the shifting sands of identity, morality, and survival in the Mediterranean. From her introduction, the reader encounters a woman whose surroundings mirror her inner turmoil. The poet spares no detail in describing the squalor of her living space, with soiled bed sheets and overfilled ashtrays serving as silent witnesses to years of struggle. These details lend authenticity to the character, grounding her experiences in the mundane realities of her existence.
The structure of the poem is both linear and cyclical, reflecting the repetitive nature of the protagonist’s days. Each stanza builds upon the preceding one, tracing her routine, her reflections, and her fleeting dreams. The imagery is visceral, painting a stark contrast between the present and the distant past. Her mornings, marked by cheap scents and hurried preparation, segue into evenings steeped in fleeting reveries.
The reference to “Time —deceitful and a shameless thief—” encapsulates the poem’s central theme. Time, portrayed as both an agent of change and a cruel usurper, becomes a character, robbing the woman of her youth, vitality, and hope. The poet’s choice of the term “shameless” suggests an indifference to the pain inflicted, reinforcing the inevitability and universality of aging and loss.
The Protagonist’s Journey: A Microcosm of Human Struggle
The life recounted in "A Shameless Thief" is one of relentless hardship. From the outset, the woman’s struggles are palpable, manifesting in her modest possessions and her stoic acceptance of daily indignities. Her retreat to the harbour serves as both an escape and a confrontation. Here, amidst the lilacs of the sea and the cacophony of sailors, she revisits her youth.
The flashbacks are potent, revealing fragments of a life once filled with excitement and allure. Former lovers, described as “kings, Bedouins, and sultans,” serve as reminders of her allure and desirability. Yet, this momentary reprieve from reality is shattered by the jeers of young sailors, whose ridicule drives her back to her seedy room. The juxtaposition of past grandeur with present humiliation underscores the transient nature of beauty and societal validation.
The poem captures the duality of memory as both a sanctuary and a torment. The protagonist’s dreams provide solace, allowing her to relive moments of joy, yet they also serve as stark reminders of what she has lost. This duality mirrors the human condition, where nostalgia offers comfort even as it sharpens the pain of the present.
Layers of Symbolism: Time, Place, and Identity
The harbour setting is emblematic of the character’s life—a liminal space where transitions occur, and identities are both formed and discarded. The sea, with its lilac hues, serves as a metaphor for endless possibilities and unfulfilled dreams. Its vastness contrasts sharply with the confines of her room, symbolising the tension between freedom and entrapment.
Time emerges as the poem’s most pervasive symbol. Described as a thief, it embodies the inevitability of change and decay. Yet, the poem’s treatment of time is not entirely devoid of hope. In her memories, the protagonist reclaims her youth and vitality, suggesting that while time may erode the body, the spirit remains untouched.
The use of odours throughout the poem—stale tobacco, cheap scents, the sweet aroma of sailors—adds a sensory dimension to the narrative, grounding it in physicality. These scents, both pleasant and unpleasant, evoke the passage of time and the layering of experiences.
A Life Beyond the Poem: The Connection to Cyprus Poetry
“A Shameless Thief” is deeply rooted in the context of Cyprus Poetry, offering insights into the cultural and social dynamics of the Mediterranean. The themes of exile, survival, and resilience resonate with the broader narrative of Cyprus, a land marked by historical upheaval and the endurance of its people. The protagonist’s story parallels the island’s own journey, marked by beauty, loss, and an unyielding will to persist.
The poet’s ability to intertwine personal and universal experiences lends the poem its enduring relevance. The struggles depicted are not confined to a specific time or place but reflect the shared human condition. Through this lens, the poem transcends its setting, becoming a poignant commentary on the passage of time and the resilience of the human spirit.
Analysis of the Themes in the Poem
The central theme of “A Shameless Thief” is the inexorable passage of time and its impact on identity and self-worth. Time is depicted as an agent of both destruction and transformation, leaving indelible marks on the protagonist’s life. Her reflections on youth and beauty underscore society’s valuation of these qualities and the pain of their loss.
Another prominent theme is resilience in the face of adversity. Despite her hardships, the protagonist continues to dream and seek solace, demonstrating an unyielding spirit. This theme aligns with the broader tradition of Cyprus Poems, which often explore survival amidst challenging circumstances.
The theme of memory as both a refuge and a source of pain is intricately woven into the narrative. The protagonist’s dreams offer brief respite from her reality, yet they also heighten her awareness of what she has lost. This duality adds depth to her character and underscores the complexity of human experience.
Analysis of the Verse
The poem’s free verse structure mirrors the protagonist’s unstructured and tumultuous life. The absence of a rigid rhyme scheme reflects the unpredictability of her journey, while the rhythmic flow captures the ebb and flow of her emotions.
The use of enjambment allows the narrative to unfold organically, creating a sense of continuity and immediacy. This technique also enhances the poem’s introspective quality, as the reader is drawn into the protagonist’s stream of consciousness.
Repetition, particularly in the imagery of her surroundings and her dreams, reinforces the cyclical nature of her existence. This repetition also serves to highlight the contrast between her past and present, underscoring the themes of loss and resilience.
Analysis of the Symbolism
Symbolism is central to the poem’s impact, with time, the sea, and scents serving as key motifs. Time, personified as a shameless thief, embodies the inevitability of change and the pain of aging. The sea, with its lilac hues, represents both the protagonist’s longing for freedom and the vastness of her unfulfilled dreams.
The protagonist’s room, with its soiled bed sheets and overfilled ashtrays, symbolises the physical and emotional toll of her life. These objects, described as her “faithful and trusted servants,” reflect her acceptance of her circumstances and her resilience in the face of adversity.
The scents that permeate the poem—stale tobacco, cheap perfume, the odours of sailors—add a sensory dimension, symbolising the layering of experiences and the passage of time. These scents anchor the narrative in physicality, making the protagonist’s experiences tangible to the reader.
Main Poetic Imagery
The poem’s imagery is both vivid and evocative, creating a rich tapestry of the protagonist’s life. The description of her room, with its “mattress with soiled bed sheets” and “ashtrays full,” sets the tone for the narrative, reflecting her inner turmoil and resilience.
The imagery of the harbour, with its lilac sea and the cacophony of sailors, provides a stark contrast to the confines of her room. This setting serves as a space of reflection and confrontation, where the protagonist revisits her past and confronts her present.
The flashbacks to her youth are imbued with sensual imagery, capturing the vibrancy of her earlier years. The descriptions of her lovers, with their “black, white and yellow faces,” evoke the diversity and intensity of her experiences, while the references to kings and sultans add a mythical quality to her memories.
Finally, the mockery of the young sailors and the protagonist’s retreat to her room are described with harrowing clarity, highlighting the cruelty of society and the pain of aging. This imagery reinforces the poem’s themes of loss and resilience, leaving a lasting impression on the reader.
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