After dark, she finds sanctuary
in the house of the lame dancers.
Listening to melancholy songs
pressed between the pages of her
faded scrapbook, she recalls her
mother's kindness— mugunghwa
blossom on her pillow and rice
cakes for breakfast. Forsaken purity struggles on her lips and the burden of her remorseful chastity lies heavy on her slender shoulders.
Evita gifts her virtue to Buenos Aires,
a city of a hundred transsexual puppets
floating shamelessly on the river wearing blue mascara and white shoes.
At night we follow a depraved arpeggio
down the stairs of a dimly lit bordello.
She tells me she is a misguided virgin
and for a peso she takes me to her bed.
Her pupils dilate and her nipples are erect.
She whispers I'm her hero
and I tell her she is beautiful— gentle words
we tell each other to survive the night.
We have exquisite sex till sunrise
yet she is in a hurry, our time is running out.
Together, we fall into the mouth of a meandering abyss — a ménage à trois with destiny —
and listen to the fading sounds of a dying tango.
I kiss Evita's lips— lavender, ice and sainthood
A few words about the poem…
Poems of Despair: Loving Evita
“Loving Evita” presents a dual narrative that explores improbable and parallel tales of love and death, blurring the lines between fantasy and reality. In this melancholic exploration, the poem delves into a complex emotional landscape, where the characters navigate through moments of tenderness and despair. This narrative is characteristic of the collection “Poems of Despair” that often blend surreal elements with poignant human experiences.
The poem opens with a description of Evita, who finds herself in a place of refuge among lame dancers, a symbol of broken dreams. Her recollections of her Korean mother's kindness define her origins and evoke a sense of lost innocence, as represented by the mugunghwa blossom and rice cakes. These images of Korea serve as a poignant contrast to her present life, where her "remorseful chastity" becomes a burden. The notion of purity is challenged as she offers her virtue to Buenos Aires, depicted as a city of transformation and ambiguity. The city's "transsexual puppets" and their extravagant appearance suggest a world of fluid identities and blurred moral lines.
In the second tale, the narrator describes an encounter with Evita—perhaps an oblique reference to Evita Peron—in a bordello, where she presents herself as a "misguided virgin." The use of language here is striking, as it encapsulates the delicate balance between vulnerability and survival. The act of love becomes a fleeting attempt to connect, a temporary escape from their respective realities. The description of their encounter is intimate yet detached, highlighting the transient nature of their relationship. The poem captures this fleeting moment with the line, "gentle words we tell each other to survive the night," suggesting a shared yet unspoken understanding of their situation.
As dawn approaches, the poem reaches a climax with the image of the couple "fall[ing] into the mouth of a meandering abyss." This metaphorical descent hints at a loss of direction or purpose, perhaps a surrender to the inexorable passage of time and fate. The poem concludes with a kiss that embodies a complex mix of emotions — a blend of "lavender, ice and sainthood," signifying purity, coldness, death, and an unreachable ideal. This conclusion leaves readers with a lingering sense of ambiguity, characteristic of the collection of the “Poems of Despair” that explore the nuances of human emotion and experience.
Comments