Our wise goddess,
you craved sainthood
but doubts racked your body.
A tortured mind,
you lived a sinless life in your books and abstinence.
An example to us all
you drank juice without ice
and resisted thoughts of sinning.
You talked of God
and of an old friend but every time you said her name
a yearning danced across your eyes; but you married a diploma instead. Now, your two diplomas framed hand in hand on your bedroom wall, look down aghast at your weekly and joyless fumblings.
I wonder though virtuous owl. When your eyes are closed and you whine that final cry, whose face do you see?
Is it perhaps that old school friend,
her wistful voice still a vacuum in your life?
If only you had a little courage.
We would have loved you no less.
A few words about the poem…
A Coming-of-Age Poem: The Inner Turmoil of “The Virtuous Owl”
"The Virtuous Owl" presents itself as a Coming-of-Age poem that delves into the complexities of self-discovery, repression, and the conflicts between societal expectations and personal desires. Through its exploration of the inner life of its protagonist, the poem captures the quiet yet profound struggles that accompany the journey from youth to adulthood, where choices made under pressure can lead to a life of regret and unfulfilled longing.
The poem begins by addressing the central figure as a "wise goddess," a title that suggests both reverence and expectation. This figure, however, is immediately revealed to be beset by doubts, a "tortured mind" that struggles to reconcile the desire for sainthood with the uncertainties that accompany it. This duality is central to the poem’s theme of coming-of-age, as the protagonist grapples with the tension between her aspirations and the reality of her inner life. The mention of living a "sinless life / in your books and abstinence" underscores the pressures placed on her to conform to an ideal of purity and virtue, even as it hints at the emotional and psychological cost of such a life.
As a Coming-of-Age poem, "The Virtuous Owl" also highlights the societal influences that shape the protagonist's decisions. The emphasis on "juice without ice" and the resistance to "thoughts of sinning" serve as metaphors for the self-imposed restrictions that define her existence. These small details reflect the ways in which societal norms and expectations can manifest in even the most mundane aspects of life, illustrating the protagonist's internalisation of these values. Her conversations about God and an "old friend" further suggest a yearning for connection and a struggle with unacknowledged desires that conflict with her carefully maintained image of virtue.
The poem’s central conflict becomes most apparent in the lines describing the protagonist's choice to "marry / a diploma instead." Here, the decision to prioritise academic and social achievements over personal fulfilment is portrayed as a significant moment in her coming-of-age journey. The image of the two diplomas "framed hand in hand / on your bedroom wall" serves as a poignant symbol of the life she has chosen, a life marked by adherence to external measures of success rather than the pursuit of authentic happiness.
Yet, despite the outward appearance of accomplishment, the protagonist is depicted as haunted by the choices she has made. The diplomas "look down aghast" at her "weekly and joyless fumblings," suggesting a deep-seated dissatisfaction and a sense of regret that permeates her existence. The poem’s closing stanzas bring this internal struggle to the forefront, as the speaker wonders whose face the protagonist sees in her final moments. The suggestion that it might be the "old school friend" with a "wistful voice" introduces the idea of lost opportunities and unfulfilled potential, central themes in many Coming-of-Age poems.
Ultimately, "The Virtuous Owl" serves as a reflective exploration of the protagonist's journey towards self-realisation. The final lines—"If only you had a little courage. / We would have loved you no less."—offer a poignant commentary on the pressures to conform and the fear of disappointing others that often accompany the transition to adulthood. The poem subtly critiques the societal structures that encourage individuals to sacrifice personal desires for the sake of outward respectability, suggesting that true coming-of-age involves the courage to embrace one's authentic self, even in the face of doubt and uncertainty.
"The Virtuous Owl" encapsulates the essence of a Coming-of-Age poem by delving into the internal conflicts and choices that define the transition from youth to adulthood. Through its exploration of themes such as repression, societal expectation, and regret, the poem offers a nuanced reflection on the complexities of growing up, making it a compelling addition to the tradition of Coming-of-Age literature.
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